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Blobby Log Owners Manual

Tagged: Little Lumps
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Blobby Log Day 146

As written by Professor Fliggins in Chapter 10: Lumplands > Vol. 1

Timestamp: Blazing Hot Noon; Day 146
Weather: BLAZING.
Landscape: Looks fine to ME.


Land Lump: And do not forget to double-scrub each blade of Lump Grass after you have de-garbaged it!  Oh – you missed a blade over here!

PF: This is ridiculous…

Land Lump: GASP!  The Little Lumps!  LOOK!

Roy: Yikes!

Blobby: Whoah – how’d so many manage to get stuck in that 6-pack plastic ring?

Little Lumps: Lump, lump, lump, gulp, gasp, lump!

PF: Sweet.  Gracious.  You know, perhaps creatures that cram their necks into plastic rings DESERVE to check out of the evolutionary continuum…

Little Lumps: Lump, gasp, gulp, lump!

Land Lump: What a MONSTER that Mr. Demon is for doing this to our pristine pastoral lives!

PF: Yeah yeah, he is a real JERK…

Roy: Just tell him it’s your Ginger-Fizz plastic rings the Lumps are stuck in…

PF: Shh!  I shall rescue you Little Imbeciles from Mr. Demon’s carelessness!  Let unky Fliggins shake you free.  Shake-shake-shake!

Little Lumps: Ow, lump, ow.

Blobby: Where you want us to put these full garbage bags?

PF: I do not care; dump them into that pond or something…

Land Lump: No!  We shall have to construct a cannon to fire this waste into the sun!

PF: WHAT!  No no no…  Look here, we can use, um, all this…

Blobby: Huh?

PF: Just go with it…  Look!  These pie tins, for instance, they sure do make radical-tastic hats and fanny-shields!

Land Lump: What?  I do not know about that, my child…

Roy: What are you doing, PF?

PF: I am NOT sticking around here trying to figure out how to build a garbage cannon that will reach the sun, not with these nincompoops!  And these empty peanut bags are great for storing marbles, loose change, or more peanuts!

Land Lump: I mean… I suppose… but the cannon…

PF: AND this shattered glass!  It… could…

Roy: Make a beautiful mosaic of a tree or something?

Land Lump: OOOoooohh!  Now that IS something!  Trees are the wisest of all creatures you know…

PF: Yes, they sure are!  Well that explains a lot…

Land Lump: Yes!  I do believe we CAN use this waste for new things!  Let us finish repurposing all of it, then we shall help you escape!

PF: Oh lovely!  And do you see these paperclips and chewed bubble gum?  Separate, they are useless, but put them together and VOILA!  A pair of smart earrings!

Land Lump: Wow!  That is pretty now and I cannot explain why!

Tres magnifique!  Let us hurry and be done with this before these tree-huggers catch on to us…

Lump Sixer

Current Mood: Under-breath-muttery.
Discoveries Made: Recycling!

Hereinto referenced: ¤ ¤ ¤ ¤

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Blobby Log Day 144

As written by Professor Fliggins in Chapter 10: Lumplands > Vol. 1

Timestamp: Early Morning; Day 144
Weather: Cloudy, full of whining.
Landscape: Pretty dirty!


Land Lump: What an impossible crisis!

PF: Yes, yes.  It is simply awful awful.  BUT we NEED to figure out how to get an airship to Foodlandia without using the air.

Land Lump: Perhaps I could help you, child, but the countryside is coated in GARBAGE.  I cannot even BEGIN to think about your problems in light of this environmental DISASTER.

Blobby: PF, we should really fess up to dumping all that stuff on the Lumplands…

PF: Silence your Blob-hole!  We have more immediate concerns that the gradual damage wrought by simple litter!

Land Lump: Oh and the Little Lumps!  They do not know what to do with it all!  THE TRAGEDY THICKENS.

Little Lumps: Lump, lump, lump…

PF: Perhaps we could harnesses on you and Roy, Blobby.  Moustachia too…

Roy: Get real, monocle boy.

Land Lump: And the rain!  It burns!  Pollution!  Chemicals!  *Cough!  Cough!*

PF: Oh, give me a BREAK.


PF: OKAY! Enough.  If we help you clean up all this garbage will you help us get home?

Land Lump: Why… yes, my child.  The Little Lumps, they are so stressed out by this invasion of their habitat, they could not even begin to clean up any of it.

Little Lumps: Lump, lump, lump…

PF: *Stress…*

Current Mood: Begrudging.
Discoveries Made: Lumps am stoopid...

Hereinto referenced: ¤ ¤ ¤ ¤ ¤