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Blobby Log Owners Manual

Tagged: Kerchief Dirigible
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Blobby Log Day 101 (part three)

As written by Professor Fliggins in Chapter 6: Isle of Detached Shawnimals > Vol. 1

Timestamp: Dusk; Day 101
Weather: Noisy.
Landscape: Shift, change, tumble, reform.


Hurry hurry, friends – we must get back in the air to find the REAL Professor Island!

Blobby, Roy, & Moustachia:
You’re back!

Yes, indeed I am and I have been so many varieties of poopy to you all I cannot begin to apologize, but we must flee!

Bingo Clem:
Why are you leaving, and in such a hurry?

I MUST get to my home to save it.  I have gagged too many lollies here in my Dark Syrup half-slumber.

Bingo Clem:
But you belong here, friend!

High Chancellor Mouth #2:
The Vice Chancellor is right – you were not respected in your home, you were shunned and mistrusted.  There is no reason to go back to that.

High Chancellor Mouth #4:
The prophecies put you here, Moustached Fliggins.

Wait – stop running and please listen with all of your ear-holes Mr. and Ms. and… It High Chancellor.  I must save Professor Island, not only will I be responsible for Mr. Demon Discovering it with his terrible evil, but I owe it to the place that raised me to protect it from harm in general.

High Chancellor Mouth #1:
We do not understand.  You have everything here and there you have nothing but closed-minds and disrespect.

Sometimes running away is one’s only option.  Sometimes the World is too unbearable so one must enter into a new World, free of that which torments.  But sometimes you can fix that from which you feel Detached.   Sometimes, one must fight to make a better home.  Sometimes, being Detached is not a permanent condition.

For me it is!

Fair enough.

So please let us leave to fight for our estranged Home, Sirs and Madames.  I am certain if the Isle faced similar peril, you would do much to protect it.

Bingo Clem:
He’s right, bosses.

High Chancellor Mouths #2 and 4:
Very well.

Thank you, friends.  So.  Does anyone know where the real Professor Island is?

All Voices:

Crowny said something in the Big Blue knows, something named Blubba.


We are not equipped to set sail on the Big Blue.

Mistew High Chancewew?  Did you say Moustaches aw woyawty here?

High Chancellor Mouth #1:
Yes, little Majesty, you and the Professor are royalty here.

Fweckew Beach – tuwn aw diwigibew into a big oh boat!

Let me translate.: Freckle-sand, please convert our airship into a watership.


*zzzhhhzhhhhzhhhhVVVVV O O O O O O RRRRMMMmmmmmffffff*


I have never seen a dust cloud participating in carpentry before.

I have.


Haha – NO!

Blobby: Shut up!


That was the most miraculous thing I have ever seen.

Bingo Clem:
This is a miraculous place, friend.

Truly.  All aboard, lads and lass!  We shall figure out how to sail along the way.  We will find this Blubba-thing!

High Chancellor Mouths 1-4:
Thank you for blessing us with the present of your presence.  You are welcome here always.

Thank you, all.  Goodbye!

Bingo Clem:
Here, take a sack full of our Freckle sand.  May its miracles serve you later.

Thank you, Professor Monkey Claw.  I shall miss you most of all!

Bingo Clem:
No problem, chum!

All Voices:

Goodbye.  Goodbye.  Goodbye-bye-bye.


Current Mood: Hanged-over?
Discoveries Made: Freckle-sand friendship!

Hereinto referenced: ¤ ¤ ¤ ¤

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Blobby Log Day 88 (part one)

As written by Blobby in Chapter 5: Ninjatown > Vol. 1

Timestamp: Morning; Day 88
Weather: Stinky Dark.
Landscape: Foreboding!


Pink Ninja: Okay, looks like we’re at the lair, in the Grumpy Tree, just South of the Stink Lagoon, like the Flying Devil said.

Blobby: That Stink Lagoon.  So appropriately named.  If I had a nose or nose hairs, they’d be incinerated right now.

Pink Ninja: Hush!  We have to catch Mr. Demon off-guard, or else we’ll alert his minions and then we’ll all be Blobby Soup!

Roy: Sick!

Moustachia: Gwacious!

Pink Ninja: Moustachia, can you sneak in, tell us what he’s doing and if there’s anyone else in the lair?

Moustachia: Oh absowutewy!

Pink Ninja: All right, while she’s surveying the scene, you guys are gonna have to create a diversion so I can…

C R A S H ! ! !

Moustachia: AHHHH!  HEWP!

Wee Devils: Gets it!  It’s flyin’s aways into tha Forest!

Moustachia: AHHHH!

Blobby: Like that?

Pink Ninja: Yes.

Roy: That’s a lot of Devils.

Pink Ninja: Hopefully that’s all of them too.  Moustachia will have to evade them long enough for us to ambush Mr. Demon.

Blobby: Well let’s hurry and get PF quick or those Wee Devils will capture Mous-

Moustachia: AHHHH!

Blobby: -tachia.

Pink Ninja: Well, c’mon!  Quiet now…  You must move with the silent stealth of a stick bug…

Roy: Oh are those the ones that look like sticks?

Blobby: No, I think those are called “branch beetles.”

Pink Ninja: Just move silently and stealthily!

Wha?!?!Mr. Demon: How annoying…  Can’t I enjoy my evil newspaper without flying moustaches coming in and RUINING IT?  Where was I?  Hmm…  Hey, stock in evil paper clips is up!

Pink Ninja: That’s not the only thing that’s up, Mr. Demon!

Blobby: Yeah, the jig!  The jig is also up!

Roy: I think that was implied…

Mr. Demon: Huh?

P O W ! ! !

Mr. Demon: Ow, my glasses!

B I F F ! ! !

Mr. Demon: OOF!

D i n k ! ! !

Mr. Demon: That was a permanent tooth!

Pink Ninja: Hold still!  Blobby, Roy — use the straps of these Devil Wings to tie him to this evil stump!

Blobby: Roy can handle it; I have to continue typing this battle…

Roy: I’ll type you…

Pink Ninja: Good!  That’ll hold.  All right, you pile of weasels — where’s the Professor!

Mr. Demon: I’m not tell…

D i n k ! ! !

Mr. Demon: OW!  Geez!  Quit knockin’ out my teef, tomorrow’th taco night!

Pink Ninja: Well then talk!

Mr. Demon: He’th right over there!  I’m gonna need an evil dentitht…

PF: *Groan grumble…  No more torture, please – I am quite full…*

Moustachia: AHHHH!

Roy: He don’t look so hot.

Blobby: How are we gonna get out?  We have to carry PF, and he’s not what you’d call “low cal.”

Roy: We’re DOOMED!

Pink Ninja: Chill out!  Where’s that hot air balloon thingy you were talking about?

Blobby: The Dirigible is right outside, but it’s deflated of Bean Gas and it’s ripped!

Pink Ninja: Don’t worry.  Everyone take some Ninja Gum and blow bubbles into the empty air sack!

Roy: Ms. Ninja, you are very quick-witted in high-pressure situations…

Pink Ninja: Thanks!  Now hurry up and blow till your adorable little cheeks burst!  You too, uggo!

Mr. Demon: Why, I refuse to *mmph!*

[Blobby’s note: Approximately 10 minutes has passed…]

Blobby: That should do it!

Roy: My adorable little cheeks hurt!

Moustachia: AHHHH!  They’we hewe!

Pink Ninja: Everyone, into the basket!  You too, Professor – UNGH!  What’s this guy full of?

Roy: Knowledge.

Blobby: And cheese.  Lots of cheese.

Roy: Yeah, knowledge, but mostly cheese.

PF: *mmm*

Pink Ninja: Here we go!

Mr. Demon: I’ll get you for ruining taco night!  I know where Profethor Island ith, and oneth I conquer it, then I’ll rule the whole entire WORLD!  BWAhh-haha-ha! *spittle*

PF: *groan – where… cheese..?*

Current Mood: My cheeks hurt.
Discoveries Made: Mr. Demon wears glasses!

Hereinto referenced: ¤ ¤ ¤ ¤ ¤ ¤

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Blobby Log Day 63

As written by Professor Fliggins in Chapter 2: Bean Village > Vol. 1

Timestamp: Morning; Day 63
Weather: Nawt Hawt.
Landscape: BEAN PRISON.


I am astonished and ashamed by how quickly I was able to descend into a life of crime.  My cell mates, the 3BT, seem increasingly less cool when I find myself charged with wack rhymez and now face imminent Splashy Smashy!

This is my second imprisonment in as many lands visited.  If I knew that every time I traveled to a foreign country I would be thrown in its least comfortable holes, I perhaps would have not left Professor Island in the first place.  I believe I am fed up with imprisonment.

A disgrace!  I will tell you, Blobby, a Discoverist must be out in the Field – lifting up rocks, peering around corners, giggling uncontrollably whilst chasing butterflies!  Discoverists should NOT be cooped up in various Pits of Despair…

I miss my Dirigible – flying among the birds whose tweet-tweeting offer me immediate updates into the emotions of the clouds, the feelings of freedom, the date/time/location of boundless soaring glory.  Tweet-tweet, my winged brothers, my swooping sisters.  Tweet-tweet.

I resolve to no longer be a be-jailed delinquent teenaged bean!  I am old!  I am good!  I am a Discoverist, darnit!

Current Mood: A Three-Bean Salad wherein the beans are "shame," "disgust," and "a longing to not be in prison!"
Discoveries Made: I take back having said, "3BT 4 Lyfe!" all those times. I have Discovered "take backs."

Hereinto referenced: ¤ ¤ ¤