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Blobby Log Owners Manual

Tagged: Moustachia
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Blobby Log Day 86

As written by Blobby in Chapter 5: Ninjatown > Vol. 1

Timestamp: ...; Day 86
Weather: Sunshine - I can see it!
Landscape: Trees rushing by.

NOTES:

Blobby: Go go go go go go go go GO GO GO GO GO!!!

Moustachia: We’w huwwying as fast as we can!

Blobby:
Huwwy faster!  Those Flying Devils are gaining on us!

Roy: You could help, buddy.

Blobby: There’s no time to help, RUN!

Flying Devil: We’ll teach yous guys to steals our antidotes!

Blobby: Yikes.  So they found that out…

Flying Devil: Yous is lucky there’s so many trees in our ways, else we’ds be chewin’ yer faces alreadys!

Blobby: Chew your own face!

Roy: Blobert, don’t taunt the vicious flying demons!

Blobby: You’re not my dad!

Moustachia: Oh no, a cweawing!  We’w doomed!

Blobby: No where to hide!  Ruh-roh!

Flying Devil: Yeahs!  No wheres indeeds!

Blobby: Well all right.  Certain peril.  Okay.  Let’s do this…

?: What the heck is this?  Why are these uggos chasing this log?

Blobby: Whassat? Photopainting_86

Flying Devil: Oh cripe!  Ninjas, of the levitatin’ Pink variety!

Pink Ninja: That’s right!  And I don’t know what this scurrying piece of wood did to you, but I’m sure it’s harmless.

Flying Devil: Nuh-uhs – they stoles the Dark Syrup antidotes what we stoles rightfully from yous!

Pink Ninja: You stole antidote from us?  That’s it!  C’mon, girls, let’s pummel them into Devil-paste!

Flying Devil: Aw, nertz…

*SMASH – BOOM –CRASH – slapslapslap – FOOM – FACE BREAK – Ka-BLAMMY!*

(Blobby ed. Note – it is very difficult to typographically capture just how much Devil-butt these Pink Ninjas are kicking.)

*BLAMMO!*

Devils: Let’s gets outta here!  Yeah!  My face and body hurt!

Flying Devil: Yous cowards!  Gets back here!

Pink Ninja: All right – surround this lead Devil, Ladies!  We’re takin’ him into Ninja-custody!

Flying Devil: Super nertz!

Blobby: Oh thank you so much, Pink Ninjas!  We’re so lucky you Discovered us…  Oh hey – DISCOVERY!!!

Limited Edition Plush Discovery 5

Current Mood: Pink Saved!
Discoveries Made: Pink Ninja!!!

Hereinto referenced: ¤ ¤ ¤ ¤ ¤

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Blobby Log Day 84

As written by Blobby in Chapter 4: Dark Forest > Vol. 1

Timestamp: ...; Day 84
Weather: DARK!
Landscape: FOREST!

NOTES:

Blobby: Boy, they call this the Dark Forest for a reason, I can’t see a thing!

Roy: You’re… not… allowed… to complain.

Moustachia: My head huwts!

Blobby:
Sorry, friends, but if I don’t sit atop the Log, steering and documenting our Adventure, then I will be in breach of my Stenographer Oath, future generations will be robbed of these historic moments, and I totally got a thing with my backbone…

Roy: You don’t have a backbone!

Blobby: Fair enough.  Let’s take a breather and get our bearings.  Roy, you can maybe even photopaint!

Roy: *grumble grumble*

Blobby: The volcano – Mount Feroshi was it? – is still a good distance away.  I don’t know how we’ll ever make it to this Ninjatown for help…

Flying Devil: Hey yous!  I thought I saw somethins ridiculous-like runnins out of the Darks Lair!

Blobby: Oh noes!

Flying Devil: I’m gonnas thump you goods I will!

Roy: Darn!  I knew I should have worn gloves to cover my inky trail!

Blobby: Roy, we’re done for!

Attack!Moustachia: Hey, wait a second!  I’w show you to be jewk-mouth!

Flying Devil: Whoa whoa!  Stays away from theres, ya cookie duster!

* S N A P ! *

Flying Devil:
My wings!  You wreckeds ‘em!  You’ll pays for this in both literal and figurative fashions…

* C R A S H ! ! ! *

Blobby: Moustachia, what’d you do?

Moustachia: His wings wewen’t weawy weaw!  I chewed frew‘ the stwap and made him cwash!

Roy: Brilliant!

Blobby: That faker wasn’t even a real Flying Devil, he’s just got magic attachable wings!  Well, let’s hurry up and get out of here before he comes to – MUSH!

Roy: Ugh…

Current Mood: ...
Discoveries Made: The Flying Devil is a LIAR!

Hereinto referenced: ¤ ¤ ¤ ¤

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Blobby Log Day 83

As written by Blobby in Chapter 4: Dark Forest > Vol. 1

Timestamp: ...; Day 83
Weather: ...
Landscape: ...

NOTES:

Quick!Blobby: Okay, we’ve rigged the Log to be transported if Moustachia flies it holding onto these reins and if Roy picks it up from behind and carries it.  I will steer and record from the top.

Moustachia: Hmm.  That doesn’t seem wight.

Roy: Yeah, that’s kind of a bum deal…

Blobby: Wait – shh!  There’s a commotion coming from the Torture Spa…

Mr. Demon: Whaa?  ARE YOU TELLING ME THERE IS A LIBRARY FULL OF THE SECRETS OF THE ORIGIN OF THE UNIVERSE?

PF: *Mmmph, yes, the Professor Professor Professor Island Library – it is named after our leader, the President of Professor Island University, Professor Professor, he is…*

Mr. Demon: Enough!  Wee Devils, we have to find this Professor Island!

Flying Devil: Whys boss?  Are wees gonna gets an Associate Degrees?

Mr. Demon: Maybe!  AND there is a secret power that all the creatures of this world are imbued with that is unknown.  These odd little researchers seem to have tapped into that power to hide their island from me and have documented this power in their library…

PF: *…and we have an entire organizational system of dot droplets that categorizes all the information for easy access, a decimal system made of dew and collected by librarian insects…*

Mr. Demon: BAH!  It will take some time, but we are going to force this little weirdo to tell us how to FIND PROFESSOR ISLAND!

Devils: Hee Hee!  Yeah!  I’m gonna major in accountin’!  Woo!

Blobby: Oh no!  If they find Professor Island, those poor old Professors will be defenseless against Mr. Demon and his hundreds of Devils!

Roy: Well let’s go get help!

Blobby: Yeah!  Towards that Volcano where there is apparently a Town of Ninjas!

Moustachia: We’w save you Mama!

PF: *…now let me tell you about all of the letters of the Professor Island Alphabet, in order from least to most delicious…*

Current Mood: ...
Discoveries Made: Time Crisis!

Hereinto referenced: ¤ ¤ ¤ ¤ ¤ ¤

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Blobby Log Day 82

As written by Blobby in Chapter 4: Dark Forest > Vol. 1

Timestamp: ...; Day 82
Weather: ...
Landscape: ...

NOTES:

SPLAT!Blobby: Hurry, Moustachia!  Get back here!  Roy’s broken his restraints!

Roy: Yar!

Blobby: He’s shooting his colored inks everywhere!  He’s possessed by the Dark Syrup!

Roy: YAR!  *splat splat*

Moustachia: I’m hewe – soaked in the antidote!

Blobby: Perfect!  Now, drip over Roy’s mouth!

Moustachia: I can’t!  You’w gonna have to wing me out!

Roy: Yar! *splat sploosh* Yar-ar-ar!

Blobby: What?  That’s… gross!

Moustachia:
It’s the onwy way!

Roy: Yar, I say! *splooshy splat splat splooshity sploosh!*

Blobby: Okay!  Come here!

Moustachia: OWWWW!

Blobby: AHH!  Sick!

Roy: YA-A-A-A-A-A-R!!!  *KA-BOOM!!!!*

Blobby: Oh my.

Moustachia: *Boo-hoo-hooo*

Roy:
Hey guys, how’s it going?  Where’s the Professor?

Current Mood: ...
Discoveries Made: An amazing technicolor nightmare jacket.

Hereinto referenced: ¤ ¤ ¤

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Blobby Log Day 72

As written by Professor Fliggins in Chapter 3: Moustachio Territory > Vol. 1

Timestamp: Morning; Day 72
Weather: HEAVENLIKE!
Landscape: A Floating Castle Couched in Clouds!

NOTES:

Oh, BLOBBY – I slept on a bed made of clouds last night!  Hairy clouds!

I do believe we Professors ARE descended from Moustachios because I AM GETTING USED TO THIS!  I AM SO GETTING USED TO THIS!  GETTING USED TO THIS IN MY HEART HEART HEART!

Blobby:
Please stop yelling into my log.

PF: I am SORRY, Blobby, but my soul will not cease its frolicking and that makes me EXCLAIM LOUDLY.

Blobby: Ugh.

Prime Ministache: Good morning, gentlemen – I trust you slept well.

PF:
Oh, Prime Ministache sir, I slept delectably!

Prime Ministache:
Capital.  And what about you, Mr. Whiskerton, how was your rest?

Whiskerton:
Sir, I didn’t sleep.

Prime Ministache: Oh?

PF:
How is that EVEN POSSIBLE?

Whiskerton:
Well I’ll tell ya – I appreciate you sending the Royal Moustachio Air Force to save us from getting pulverized by my buddies and all, and I certainly am privileged to be in your fancy castle, but I’m feelin’ kinda rotten.

Prime Ministache: Like you have abandoned your People, perhaps?

Whiskerton: Yessir.  Workin’ as a Royal Barber and hanging around Professor Fred here, it’s like I’m trying to be more civilized and so-phisticated than’s natural.  It’s like I’m pretending to be a Moustachio when I’m just a lowly Beard.  Those fellas don’t mean to be so ornery – but considering how none of them have as nice a job as me, I mean, I’d be angerfied myself!

Prime Ministache:
Well, Whiskerton, we see a lot from up here that you “lowly” Beards do, and we’ve been keeping a close watch on you since you started taking care of the little Baby ‘Stache you rescued…

Baby ‘Stache: *meep!*

Whiskerton: Oh Moustachia?  You know about her too?  Good grief, I AM a sell-out!

PF: Well, clearly!

Prime Ministache: Mr. Whiskerton, your only ethical concern should be that you are TOO kind!  To be honest, so many of the creatures we see from on high could learn something from you.  The bickering between Beards and Moustachios, the Beans and their ridiculous legal system, those bonkers Hot Dogs with their immature King – it’s all simply madness!

Whiskerton: I suppose you’re right, sir – this IS a crazy world.  I don’t know, even though I’m being pulled every which way, there’s something in me that’ll never turn away helpless critters like Moustachia and Fred here – even if it fetches me gobs of trouble.  I just can’t say no to creatures in need.  Sigh…

Prime Ministache: That’s why we saved you, Whiskerton – because someone should finally be rewarded for bringing our peoples together.  I am getting on in years, and frankly, I can’t stomach much more of the disparity between Moustachios and Beards.  You’re a remarkable fellow for seeing past what’s on all our hairy surfaces.

Whiskerton:
Aw heck, thank you, sir.

PF: Whiskerton, you…  you really want to help EVERYBODY?

Whiskerton: Well, yeah, I suppose so, Fred.

PF: *sniff*  So…  touching…

Whiskerton: What’s that?

PF: *BUH-BUH! buh-huh-huh!*

Prime Ministache: There there, Professor.  Don’t weep, man.

Blobby:
Just let him cry it out.  It’s the only way now.

PF: He is just so NICE!  *Guh-HUH!*

Prime Ministache: Oh my.

Whiskerton: It’s okay, Fred.  Here take my hankerchief!

PF: *hoooonk!* A HANKY TO SNOT-CRY INTO!  THE KINDNESS IS ENDLESS AND I HAVE BEEN A BIG JERK-MAN-HEAD TO YOU! *BAHHHH-huh-huh!*

Whiskerton: I forgive you, Fred.

PF: FORGIVENESS!  *Bah-huh bah-huh bah-huh-huh-hic!*

Current Mood: OPENLY SOBBING FOR KINDNESS!
Discoveries Made: It is like, LIFE is SO HARD, and there is ALL of THESE THINGS keeping us apart from one another, YOU KNOW? It is not just, like, TOLERANCE, you know? It is like ACCEPTANCE, no matter what kind of facial hair creature you are.

Hereinto referenced: ¤ ¤ ¤